I take a break from the afformentioned blogging hiatus to bring you something from Facebook.
A friend of mine mentioned that one of her friends was complaining about her boyfriends upcoming three-month deployment. She replied by saying she wish her hubby was only gone for three months instead of a year. Her friend took it the wrong way and got upset.
Honestly, when I first read her update I also got upset and immediately defensive. My husband will be gone for three months, too, and while I know there’s a light at the end of this somewhat short tunnel, I can’t see it yet. I agree that it’s not fair some of our men and women deploy for shorter lengths than others, but gosh dammit – it’s hard on everyone!
A lot of people tell me, “Oh, it’s only three months, it’ll go by fast.” And you know what I want to do? I want to punch them and ask them to stop talking…even if they’ve gone through hundreds of deployments before. Because even if they’re trying to make me feel better, the reality is that they’re making me feel worse.
It makes me feel worse, because while this deployment should go by fast, I know there will be days and nights when I’ll throw myself a pity party by eating bags (oh yes, plural) of chips and watching How I Met Your Mother, praying the clock will tick faster so I can go to bed and hopefully sleep.
Yes, in retrospect—once it’s all over and he’s back here in my arms—three months will probably seem like a few short weeks, but to assume it’s going to fly by and be a walk in the park is a little much. A much better answer, I think, would be to say something like, “I’m so sorry. I know it’ll be really tough for you, but let’s hang out while he’s gone so I can get you out of the house and distract you.”
I’m sorry if I got a little heated, it’s just that deployments and TDYs, no matter how long or short they are, are really big deals. Maybe it’s because I’m still new to the game, but I wish people would stop making it seem like it’s a happy vacation, because in my opinion, it’s not.